32. People Pleasing in Marriage, Part 1Dec 10, 2021
People pleasing comes up a lot with people we work with. It promotes shame and secrecy, not being authentic to yourself. It can interfere with intimacy and connection and healthier relationship. How we see this show up in people’s marriages. The term “people pleasing” sounds too pretty, too pleasant. We’re talking about what people pleasing really is. How to spot it. Why we do it. Why it can almost feel like life-or-death. How to do something constructive about it. Some personal experiences. Maybe you’re worried that honesty with her will limit your access to porn AND to sex with her at the same time. If you don’t know how to control your habits/urges yet, or how to want life without porn, this can be very threatening. Why trying to change how your spouse feels (help them feel better) isn’t always the most useful approach. Part 2 coming next week.
Listen to the full episode HERE.
Lindsay and Danny Poelman are certified life coaches and are members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Danny helps guys to stop looking at porn and make their real life and/or marriage what they want it to be. Lindsay helps women let go of the fantasy marriage that doesn’t exist and create the marriage of their dreams in real life.